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Rainbow baby

The term rainbow baby refers to a baby that is born after the loss of a child. In this article, I will discuss the amount of time bereaved parents wait for until having another child – when they lost the only one they had.

Before we start with this topic, let’s remind ourselves that this is a very delicate topic and that there is no correct answer to when they start thinking about having another child.

Yet, I wanted to create a research and find out how different couples deal with the idea of a rainbow baby.

This topic can be deeply personal, shaped by countless complex emotions, and it can as well be followed by cultural factors, biological ones, as well as relationship status and health.

  1. Grief doesn’t have a time frame. For many times on our website, we have already discussed that the grieving process varies from person to person, and that there is no standard “waiting period.” Besides that, I’ve told you that the grief of this sort doesn’t have to be linear, but it definitely carries a long-term sorrow. Some studies have shown that after losing their only child, parents will wait at least one year, but most of them wait up to 5 years. Of course, there are those who consider new pregnancy later than that – or never.
  2. What do therapists suggest? For parents to have a new child and to feel happy about it, it is a must that they wait until they can think of a rainbow baby as a completely new and separate person, not connecting them or reflecting on them as of a child they’ve lost.
  3. Biological factors. Bereaved parents who are in their late 30s or 40s usually wait less than others, due to the fact that they can encounter issues with fertility. For them, it may be harder than for other couples because the process can be more stressful, and it often comes with a feeling of guilt that they haven’t grieved enough.
  4. Society’s pressure. Some couples feel rushed that they need to have another baby as soon as possible, despite the fact that at least one of them is not emotionally ready for that journey.
  5. When is it healthy to try again? Many mental health experts say that the couple must be in the state of stability and share mutual desire and understanding. Bereaved parents should be able to talk about their lost child without feeling completely desperate. Another, truly important factor, is that the couple desires a child, but a new child – not the one that will have to fill the gap of emptiness of the lost child.

The conclusion is the same as the beginning of this blog post – we can say that there’s certainly no right timeline for parents coping with the unimaginable loss of their only child.

Remember – a rainbow baby should be welcomed to your family life for their own uniqueness.

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